6 metrekarelik d\u00fckk\u00e2n d\u00f6nemlerimdi\u2026<\/p>\n
\u0130nsan o d\u00f6nemlerde sadece ticaret yapm\u0131yor; can s\u0131k\u0131nt\u0131s\u0131ndan bazen deneysel \u00e7al\u0131\u015fmalara da ba\u015fl\u0131yor.<\/p>\n
D\u00fckk\u00e2n\u0131n tam \u00e7apraz\u0131nda bir kad\u0131n kuaf\u00f6r\u00fc vard\u0131.<\/p>\n
\u0130\u00e7eride 8\u201310 kad\u0131n \u00e7al\u0131\u015f\u0131yordu.<\/p>\n
Tuvalete gitmek i\u00e7in de s\u00fcrekli benim d\u00fckk\u00e2n\u0131n \u00f6n\u00fcnden ge\u00e7iyorlard\u0131.<\/p>\n
\u0130\u00e7lerinden biri vard\u0131: Bahar.<\/p>\n
\u00c7ok sevdi\u011fim, enerjik, ne\u015feli bir karde\u015fimdi.<\/p>\n
Bir g\u00fcn kap\u0131dan \u00e7\u0131kt\u0131 ama\u2026 peri\u015fan haldeydi.<\/p>\n
Ba\u015f\u0131n\u0131 yana e\u011fmi\u015f, y\u00fcz\u00fc d\u00fc\u015fm\u00fc\u015f, g\u00f6zleri yar\u0131 kapal\u0131 \u015fekilde a\u011f\u0131r a\u011f\u0131r y\u00fcr\u00fcyordu.<\/p>\n
\u201cBahar bu ne h\u00e2l?\u201d dedim.<\/p>\n
\u201cAbi\u2026\u201d dedi, \u201cba\u015f\u0131m \u00e7atl\u0131yor\u2026 ka\u00e7 tane ila\u00e7 i\u00e7tim ge\u00e7medi\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n
Ger\u00e7ekten h\u00e2line bak\u0131nca insan\u0131n i\u00e7i gidiyordu.<\/p>\n
Tam o anda i\u00e7ime muziplik d\u00fc\u015ft\u00fc.<\/p>\n
\u201cGel hele \u015f\u00f6yle otur,\u201d dedim.<\/p>\n
Merakla oturdu.<\/p>\n
Sesimi iyice al\u00e7altt\u0131m:<\/p>\n
\u201c\u015eimdi sana bir \u015fey yapaca\u011f\u0131m\u2026 ama bu kesinlikle aram\u0131zda kalacak.\u201d<\/p>\n
Bir anda y\u00fcz\u00fcndeki ifade de\u011fi\u015fti.<\/p>\n
A\u011fr\u0131s\u0131n\u0131n yar\u0131s\u0131 o anda gitmi\u015fti zaten.<\/p>\n
G\u00f6zleri b\u00fcy\u00fcd\u00fc.<\/p>\n
\u201cNe yapacaks\u0131n abi?\u201d dedi.<\/p>\n
Biraz daha gizemli konu\u015fmaya ba\u015flad\u0131m:<\/p>\n
\u201cBen rahmetli dedemden el ald\u0131m.\u201d<\/p>\n
Bunu s\u00f6ylerken ciddi durmaya \u00e7al\u0131\u015f\u0131yorum ama i\u00e7imden kahkahalar at\u0131yorum.<\/p>\n
\u201cBug\u00fcne kadar kimseye s\u00f6ylemedim. Baz\u0131 \u00f6zel yeteneklerim var. Seni b\u00f6yle g\u00f6r\u00fcnce dayanamad\u0131m.\u201d<\/p>\n
Bahar nefesini tutmu\u015f beni dinliyordu.<\/p>\n
Kad\u0131n o an art\u0131k ba\u015f a\u011fr\u0131s\u0131n\u0131 falan unutmu\u015ftu.<\/p>\n
Masan\u0131n kar\u015f\u0131s\u0131na ge\u00e7ti.<\/p>\n
Ben de ba\u015flad\u0131m tarif etmeye:<\/p>\n
\u201c\u015eimdi \u00f6ne e\u011fil\u2026 dirseklerini dizlerine koy\u2026 i\u015faret parmaklar\u0131n\u0131 ka\u015flar\u0131n\u0131n bitimine bast\u0131r\u2026 ve g\u00f6zlerini kapat.\u201d<\/p>\n
Dediklerimi harfiyen yap\u0131yordu.<\/p>\n
Art\u0131k tamamen role girmi\u015ftim.<\/p>\n
\u201c\u015eimdi\u2026\u201d dedim, \u201cg\u00f6ky\u00fcz\u00fcndeki bulutlar\u0131 hayal et\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cBulutlar yava\u015f yava\u015f da\u011f\u0131l\u0131yor\u2026 ve arkada masmavi bir g\u00f6ky\u00fcz\u00fc kal\u0131yor\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cBulutlar da\u011f\u0131ld\u0131k\u00e7a\u2026 ba\u015f\u0131ndaki a\u011fr\u0131 da gidiyor\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n
Bir ara g\u00f6zlerini a\u00e7acak gibi oldu.<\/p>\n
\u201cSAKIN A\u00c7MA!\u201d dedim.<\/p>\n
Kad\u0131n resmen transa girmi\u015fti.<\/p>\n
Ben bu s\u0131rada yar\u0131m kalan \u00e7ay\u0131 i\u00e7iyorum. Bir de sigara yakm\u0131\u015f\u0131m.<\/p>\n
Birka\u00e7 dakika sonra:<\/p>\n
\u201cTamam,\u201d dedim. \u201cG\u00f6zlerini a\u00e7abilirsin.\u201d<\/p>\n
Bahar g\u00f6zlerini a\u00e7t\u0131.<\/p>\n
Bir anda y\u00fcz\u00fc de\u011fi\u015fti.<\/p>\n
\u201cAbii ! Ge\u00e7ti!\u201d diye hayk\u0131rd\u0131.<\/p>\n
Sonra mutluluktan boynuma sar\u0131ld\u0131.<\/p>\n
\u201cAbi inanam\u0131yorum\u2026 ak\u015famdan beri ge\u00e7meyen a\u011fr\u0131 gitti!\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cTamam tamam\u2026\u201d dedim. \u201cC\u0131v\u0131tma. Ama unutma\u2026 bu sadece ikimizin aras\u0131nda kalacak.\u201d<\/p>\n
Hayran hayran bakarak d\u00fckk\u00e2ndan \u00e7\u0131kt\u0131.<\/p>\n
Ben i\u00e7eride tek ba\u015f\u0131ma kahkaha at\u0131yorum.<\/p>\n
Ama hik\u00e2ye burada bitmedi tabii.<\/p>\n
Ertesi g\u00fcn Bahar d\u00fckk\u00e2n\u0131n \u00f6n\u00fcnden ge\u00e7erken bana \u00f6yle bak\u0131yor ki\u2026 sanki Himalayalar\u2019da inzivadan yeni d\u00f6nm\u00fc\u015f bir bilge ki\u015fiyim.<\/p>\n
G\u00f6zlerinde resmen mistik sayg\u0131 vard\u0131.<\/p>\n
\u0130ki g\u00fcn sonra ak\u015fam\u00fcst\u00fc yine geldi.<\/p>\n
Bu kez su\u00e7 i\u015flemi\u015f \u00e7ocuk gibi mahcup.<\/p>\n
Ellerini ovu\u015fturuyor.<\/p>\n
\u201cAbi\u2026\u201d dedi, \u201cbir \u015fey diyece\u011fim ama k\u0131zma\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n
Daha c\u00fcmlesini bitirmeden ba\u011f\u0131rd\u0131m:<\/p>\n
\u201cBaharrr! Kuaf\u00f6rde anlatt\u0131n de\u011fil mi?\u201d<\/p>\n
Panik yapt\u0131 hemen:<\/p>\n
\u201cYok abi vallahi herkese anlatmad\u0131m!\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cEeee?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cSadece Mehtap\u2019a s\u00f6yledim\u2026 onun da ba\u015f\u0131 \u00e7ok a\u011fr\u0131yor\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n
Koptum i\u00e7imden tabii.<\/p>\n
\u201c\u00c7a\u011f\u0131r gelsin,\u201d dedim.<\/p>\n
Mehtap geldi.<\/p>\n
Ayn\u0131 seremoni. Ayn\u0131 bulutlar. Ayn\u0131 mavi g\u00f6ky\u00fcz\u00fc.<\/p>\n
Bu kez biraz daha profesyonelle\u015fmi\u015fim.<\/p>\n
Arada ka\u015f \u00e7at\u0131yorum falan.<\/p>\n
Kad\u0131n birka\u00e7 dakika sonra g\u00f6zlerini a\u00e7t\u0131:<\/p>\n
\u201cGer\u00e7ekten ge\u00e7ti!\u201d<\/p>\n
\u0130kisi de bana sanki NASA\u2019dan gizli proje y\u00fcr\u00fct\u00fcyormu\u015fum gibi bak\u0131yor.<\/p>\n
Art\u0131k dayanamad\u0131m.<\/p>\n
\u201cGel oturun \u015f\u00f6yle,\u201d dedim.<\/p>\n
Sonra ger\u00e7e\u011fi anlatt\u0131m.<\/p>\n
“Bak\u0131n k\u0131zlar,” dedim.<\/p>\n
“Benim ne rahmetli dedemden ald\u0131\u011f\u0131m bir s\u0131r var, ne de do\u011fa\u00fcst\u00fc bir g\u00fcc\u00fcm.”<\/p>\n
“D\u00fcn siz g\u00f6zlerinizi kapat\u0131p bulutlar\u0131n da\u011f\u0131lmas\u0131n\u0131 hayal ederken ben burada \u00e7ay i\u00e7iyor, sigara i\u00e7iyordum.”<\/p>\n
\u00d6nce g\u00fcld\u00fcler..<\/p>\n
Ama sonra d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnd\u00fcler.<\/p>\n
Asl\u0131nda ge\u00e7en \u015fey ba\u015f a\u011fr\u0131s\u0131ndan daha ilgin\u00e7ti.<\/p>\n
\u00c7\u00fcnk\u00fc ortada ger\u00e7ekten var olmayan bir g\u00fcce inanm\u0131\u015flard\u0131.<\/p>\n
\u0130nsan zihni bazen \u00e7ok ilgin\u00e7 \u00e7al\u0131\u015f\u0131yor.<\/p>\n
Bir \u015feyi ne kadar g\u00fc\u00e7l\u00fc bi\u00e7imde beklersek, bazen onun etkisini ger\u00e7ekten ya\u015famaya ba\u015fl\u0131yoruz.<\/p>\n
Korkular\u0131m\u0131z\u0131n b\u00fcy\u00fcmesi de b\u00f6yle…<\/p>\n
Cesaretimizin artmas\u0131 da…<\/p>\n
Umudumuzun ye\u015fermesi de…<\/p>\n
Bazen bir s\u00f6z, bazen bir bak\u0131\u015f, bazen de hi\u00e7bir ger\u00e7ekli\u011fi olmayan bir hik\u00e2ye bile insan\u0131n \u00fczerinde beklenmedik etkiler olu\u015fturabiliyor.<\/p>\n
Belki de bu y\u00fczden insanlar tarih boyunca t\u00fcrl\u00fc muskalar\u0131n, sahte \u015fifac\u0131lar\u0131n, falc\u0131lar\u0131n, \u00fcf\u00fcr\u00fck\u00e7\u00fclerin ve kendilerini \u00f6zel g\u00fc\u00e7 sahibi gibi g\u00f6steren ki\u015filerin pe\u015finden gitmi\u015fler.<\/p>\n
\u00c7\u00fcnk\u00fc insanlar \u00e7o\u011fu zaman ger\u00e7e\u011fe de\u011fil, umutlar\u0131na tutunuyor.<\/p>\n
O g\u00fcn Bahar’\u0131n ba\u015f a\u011fr\u0131s\u0131 ger\u00e7ekten ge\u00e7mi\u015f miydi?<\/p>\n
Belki.<\/p>\n
Ama ge\u00e7en \u015fey benim elimden \u00e7\u0131kan bir g\u00fc\u00e7 de\u011fildi.<\/p>\n
Onun kendi zihninin, kendi inanc\u0131n\u0131n ve kendi beklentisinin olu\u015fturdu\u011fu bir etkiydi.<\/p>\n
O g\u00fcn k\u00fc\u00e7\u00fck d\u00fckk\u00e2nda \u015funu bir kez daha anlad\u0131m:<\/p>\n
\u0130nsan bazen kand\u0131r\u0131ld\u0131\u011f\u0131 i\u00e7in de\u011fil, inanmak istedi\u011fi i\u00e7in kan\u0131yor.<\/strong><\/p>\n Bu y\u00fczden hayat\u0131n i\u00e7inde kar\u015f\u0131la\u015ft\u0131\u011f\u0131m\u0131z her iddiaya, her mucize hik\u00e2yesine ve her “sadece bende var” diyen ki\u015fiye biraz mesafeden bakabilmek gerekiyor.<\/p>\n \u00c7\u00fcnk\u00fc bazen en b\u00fcy\u00fck g\u00fc\u00e7; ba\u015fkas\u0131n\u0131n anlatt\u0131\u011f\u0131 hik\u00e2yeye kap\u0131lmak de\u011fil, kendi akl\u0131n\u0131 da yan\u0131nda g\u00f6t\u00fcrebilmektir.<\/p>\n Y\u0131llar sonra d\u00f6n\u00fcp bakt\u0131\u011f\u0131mda o g\u00fcn\u00fcn bana \u00f6\u011fretti\u011fi \u015feyin ba\u015f a\u011fr\u0131s\u0131ndan \u00e7ok daha farkl\u0131 oldu\u011funu g\u00f6r\u00fcyorum.<\/p>\n \u00c7\u00fcnk\u00fc o g\u00fcn de\u011fi\u015fen \u015fey ger\u00e7ekler de\u011fildi.<\/p>\n Sadece alg\u0131 de\u011fi\u015fmi\u015fti.<\/p>\n Ben ayn\u0131 bendim.<\/p>\n D\u00fckk\u00e2n ayn\u0131 d\u00fckk\u00e2nd\u0131.<\/p>\n \u00c7ay ayn\u0131 \u00e7ayd\u0131.<\/p>\n Ama Bahar’\u0131n zihnindeki alg\u0131 de\u011fi\u015fince, ya\u015fad\u0131\u011f\u0131 deneyim de de\u011fi\u015fmi\u015fti.<\/p>\n Hayat\u0131n bir\u00e7ok alan\u0131nda da durum bundan \u00e7ok farkl\u0131 de\u011fil asl\u0131nda.<\/p>\n \u0130nsanlar \u00e7o\u011fu zaman ger\u00e7eklere de\u011fil, ger\u00e7ek sand\u0131klar\u0131 alg\u0131lara tepki veriyor.<\/p>\n Bazen bir insan\u0131 hi\u00e7 tan\u0131madan sever ya da sevmezler.<\/p>\n Bazen bir \u00fcr\u00fcn\u00fc kullanmadan iyi veya k\u00f6t\u00fc oldu\u011funa karar verirler.<\/p>\n Bazen bir kalabal\u0131\u011f\u0131n pe\u015fine tak\u0131l\u0131r, bazen de korkular\u0131n\u0131n pe\u015finden s\u00fcr\u00fcklenirler.<\/p>\n \u00c7\u00fcnk\u00fc alg\u0131, ger\u00e7e\u011fin \u00f6n\u00fcne ge\u00e7ti\u011finde insan art\u0131k olan\u0131 de\u011fil, kendisine g\u00f6sterileni g\u00f6rmeye ba\u015fl\u0131yor.<\/p>\n Belki de bu y\u00fczden reklamlar var.<\/p>\n Propagandalar var.<\/p>\n Manip\u00fclasyonlar var.<\/p>\n Ve insanlar\u0131 etkilemek i\u00e7in kurulmu\u015f say\u0131s\u0131z d\u00fczen var.<\/p>\n \u00c7\u00fcnk\u00fc insan\u0131 y\u00f6netmenin en kolay yolu \u00e7o\u011fu zaman ger\u00e7e\u011fi de\u011fi\u015ftirmek de\u011fil, ger\u00e7e\u011fi nas\u0131l g\u00f6rd\u00fc\u011f\u00fcn\u00fc de\u011fi\u015ftirmektir.<\/strong><\/p>\n O g\u00fcn k\u00fc\u00e7\u00fck d\u00fckk\u00e2nda iki gen\u00e7 k\u0131z\u0131n ba\u015f a\u011fr\u0131s\u0131 \u00fczerinden g\u00f6rd\u00fc\u011f\u00fcm \u015fey buydu.<\/p>\n \u0130nsan bazen bilgi eksikli\u011finden de\u011fil, alg\u0131s\u0131n\u0131n y\u00f6nlendirilmesinden dolay\u0131 yan\u0131labiliyor.<\/p>\n Bu y\u00fczden y\u0131llar i\u00e7inde \u00f6\u011frendi\u011fim en \u00f6nemli \u015feylerden biri \u015fu oldu:<\/p>\n Duydu\u011fum her \u015feye hemen inanmamaya \u00e7al\u0131\u015fmak…<\/p>\n G\u00f6rd\u00fc\u011f\u00fcm her \u015feyi oldu\u011fu gibi kabul etmemek…<\/p>\n Ve \u00f6zellikle de bana sunulan alg\u0131yla, ger\u00e7e\u011fin ayn\u0131 \u015fey olup olmad\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131 sorgulamak.<\/p>\n \u00c7\u00fcnk\u00fc \u00f6zg\u00fcrl\u00fck, sadece se\u00e7im yapabilmek de\u011fildir.<\/p>\n \u00d6zg\u00fcrl\u00fck; se\u00e7imlerini kendi akl\u0131yla yapabilmektir.<\/p>\n Ve ak\u0131l, alg\u0131n\u0131n de\u011fil ger\u00e7e\u011fin pe\u015finden y\u00fcr\u00fcd\u00fc\u011f\u00fc s\u00fcrece insana en g\u00fcvenilir yol arkada\u015f\u0131 olur.<\/p>\n \u00c7\u00fcnk\u00fc bazen insan\u0131 zincire vuran \u015fey demir de\u011fildir; sorgulanmadan kabul edilmi\u015f alg\u0131lard\u0131r.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n \u270d\ufe0fAli \u0130hsan Sivri hik\u00e2yeleri<\/em><\/p>\n <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" 6 metrekarelik d\u00fckk\u00e2n d\u00f6nemlerimdi\u2026 \u0130nsan o d\u00f6nemlerde sadece ticaret yapm\u0131yor; can s\u0131k\u0131nt\u0131s\u0131ndan bazen deneysel \u00e7al\u0131\u015fmalara da ba\u015fl\u0131yor. D\u00fckk\u00e2n\u0131n tam \u00e7apraz\u0131nda > Devam\u0131n\u0131 Oku<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[4],"tags":[347,346,270,266,348],"class_list":["post-359","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-bu-yoldan-gectim","tag-akil-ile-sorgulamak","tag-algi","tag-ali-ihsan-sivri-hikayeleri","tag-yasanmislik","tag-yonlendirilmek"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/buyoldangectim.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/359","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/buyoldangectim.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/buyoldangectim.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/buyoldangectim.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/buyoldangectim.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=359"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/buyoldangectim.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/359\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":361,"href":"https:\/\/buyoldangectim.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/359\/revisions\/361"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/buyoldangectim.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=359"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/buyoldangectim.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=359"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/buyoldangectim.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=359"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}